To be completely honest, I cannot really recall why I had decided
to take on website building.
It came about in September '18. I was stuck in high school and
was bored out of my mind. I wanted something to work on aside from
schoolwork... Actual work to fulfill myself, and not to fulfill others. I was
drawn to the basic abilities that building a website can bring. I
don't think I ever shown any interested in web-building, except
for maybe a blogspot page I made earlier that year. I don't really
think I had ever seen a lot of "simple websites" at the time
(besides browsing people's old blogs), so, a lot of my first tries
at making my website kind-of stemmed from my own narrow personal
preferences.
I never started the website with any agenda or true intent. It
was just something to do in the offtime when I finished my
schoolwork. In fact, it was such a last-minute thing to preoccupy
myself with, that I originally found purpose in the website as a
place to drop my social links. I don't think those linking webapps
existed at the time, so I thought to myself, "Given how many
accounts I have floating around the web, I'd probably be better to
use it as some aggregate landing page." To be honest, I was never
a terribly active internet user at the time, aside from my
incessant use of Discord.
A lot of the chronology that I would've wrote in here is already
said in "What Exactly Do I Want?". To make it short and
sweet, I (quite literally) grew up on the internet for the last
half of my childhood, then promptly became disillusioned with it
as I got older. I retreated into Neocities as a way to at least
make myself known in a way that doesn't restrict myself, and
doesn't make myself associated with the new typical malaise that
social media and even knit-tight internet communities inhibit.
From that point on, I've continued to predominantly associate
myself online, and spend more time with Neocities. Not exactly as
an identity, but moreso as a comfort zone. The internet can be a
great oppurtunity to make yourself known to the whole world, so I
still want to take advantage of that. I just kind-of wanted to be,
y'know, quiet about it. Not loud, not demeaning, not
imposing, just expressive in the most quiet way.
I'm not going to go on a typical Yesterweb manifesto tangent on web
this, web that. I do agree with a lot of what people say,
but at what point does it sound like we're all singing to the
choir? I digress, but lets be honest, I think we all know why we
are here. To get away from it all! We sure as hell cannot fuck off
to a little cabin in the woods, so instead, we make a tiny website
in a tiny collective of other tiny websites, not largely known by
the general web (though I would argue that Neocities has been
picking up in popularity, and in public knowledge as of fairly
recent)... and I embrace it!
I do have an intuition that a lot of the Neocities-proud users
are trying to replace their former very active internet activity
with Neocities, and I'm not really in the same boat, being someone
who's cut a lot of ties on the internet (but still keeping a few),
and has immensely become more fond with forming interpersonal
connections. What's the term they use... Netizen? Yeah, I don't
personally feel like I fall into that boat anymore. In a way, this
website has come back to being something on the backburner... A
last minute place to work on just so people I know and people
online can stop by. Believe it or not, a huge amount of my current
inspiration comes from old band (predominantly independent band)
websites, predominantly from the era of '95 to '05 (this is TOTALLY
not biased because I like music from this era). When I browse
them, it's less of a place for "being online" with the band, and
more of just, "Hey. We exist. Look at our press photos. Check out
the band member's bios. If you want to see us, here's our current
tour dates. Email the band members if you want, but don't expect
an instant response. Stop by again soon!"
There's something weird about those websites I really, really,
love. It's not like they were intentionally trying to come off in
a way like this... It was mostly spurred by the limitations and
necessities that the internet facilitated. The internet, a lot
like TV, used to be just a box at home, or at the library, and not
something that you took with you. It was just a place to exist
on, and not live on. Chatrooms like those on IRC,
AIM, YahooIM, etc. did exist, but, again, it was usually only
accessible on the box at home. That's how I want to go
about my existence on Neocities. I just want to exist and not live
on it. I don't really want to come with a loud agenda, a
manifesto, or a loud-and-proud collective belief. I just want to
bring my existence, set it up, make it look nice, and occasionally
check on it. In a sense, I want to take on the most direct
definition of independent website. Not to be confused with
IndieWeb, Another organization that although I share sentiment
with, I don't really assoicate myself with. Along with this, I've
started to refrain with being wholly associated with Neocities as
a collective. I'd rather associate with the medium in which the
ecosystem thrives in.
I know this was kind of a rant, but I don't malicious intention
with me in this, and I do apologize if it came off this way. I
really love Neocities! It's certainly been the most I've ever
fulfilled out of every internet community I've joined. It's also
been the only community of people on the internet that can take
themselves seriously, and I truly mean it. But... in every
internet community, no matter the medium, nor demographic, nor
even how much you like it, there's always room to point out
something that bothers you.
Anyhow, that's been my two cents on Neocities. Feel free to email
me if you have any comments. My guestbook is fine, too.