So I've started a new job that's been fantastic. The only downside is that as soon as I started working for it, I've been having a whole bunch of doctor's appts that have been racking my brain and I'm now on two new meds (one being a famous anti-depressant/anti-anxiety) and ironically it's making me feel slightly more anxious.
I should probably write about my experiences with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (and more-so OCD) over the past two years.
6.17.24I've been kinda been thinking a lot of how the machines inside my car work.
I didn't read a book about them yet, but rest assured I will read a book about them soon.
6.11.24It's been about 5 days since the rework/update, and so far it's shaping up really nicely. I'm liking the new look very much.
I just reworked the film photo gallery to align more with the new style, along with some new photos I took. The digital gallery will follow soon after... it'll look the exact same.
5.29.24Website version 5.0 is now up.
I was bored tonight... So I thought, "let's randomly rework the website!"
Some of the extra pages still need to be worked on (namely the photo gallery), so it's not entirely done yet.
Oh, and, before you scream that it looks absolutely broken... clear your browser cache, or view it in a private tab.
5.24.24So... Before I started this website, I used to be a very active Team Fortress 2 player. I predominantly played between February 2017 to May of 2021. I accrued 1,400 hours in the game in that short of a timeframe.
Back on May 9th, I had just finished up my last final exam and I was feeling bored. TF2 came up in my head out of nowhere, and I felt a weird inclination to return to the game. It's only been 2 weeks so far... I've already put in 46 hours in. Help me.
5.22.24Tying up loose ends in my life before the Summer starts, and today's the last day of finals. I'm actually feeling hopeful in my life.
I'm likely to be leaving my IT/audio-visual job very soon, I finally got an internship. The work environment is very lenient and the benefits seem really great. It's pretty exciting to finally enter the workforce that involves my major.
I'm still at the college radio station, still doing audio engineering work. Kinda sucks a little bit.
That's life right now. It's 70% good now, not quite 100%.
So I heard that 123guestbook is closing? I didn't like it too much. For some reason, I got much less visitors and comments using it. I guess I liked the custom URLs they would allow to use, and the fact that it was HTTPS. I've been a predominant user of smartGB and I've been very happy with how it's ran, I actually people should go on to use it. I dunno. Just an opinion.
REST IN PEACE STEVE ALBINI!
5.8.24I feel like updating this more. It's the end of the semester but I have some work to do. Am bored.
I did my final photography assignment for a class and shot with my Canon EOS ElanIIe with some borrowed Ultrasonic lenses with 400 speed color film. I love the fact that I own this camera, but I don't love not owning the lenses I'm borrowing. This 28-135mm that I have the pleasure of using is fucking MARVELOUS! Canon just knows how to make lenses that feel great.
I also had another camera on hand with me, a Nikon F3 loaded with Ultramax with a 24mm lens on it. I think I'm enlightened. The F3 is so nice, I'm thinking of buying one for myself. It's a shame that I'm borrowing it. It's pretty much a perfectly made SLR that's not a pain in the fucking ass like most Olympuses and Minoltas are. I've had the unfortunate displeasure of using an OM-1 to shoot a roll about 4 years ago. The camera is a frustrating un-ergonomic piece of shit that has a film advance so sharp it was giving me blisters and loading the film was also terribly frustrating. Even a Canon AE-1 from this era would be marginally better than using this! I can't imagine why anyone would want to use an SLR pre-1980.
That was fun enough to distract me from everything else going on. I'm just terribly busy with everything right now. Two weekends in a row of traveling to see friends and I haven't really had a day to myself. I'm typing this right now on shift at work, and then when work ends I have to go straight to classes for 6 hours straight. This has been the last 4 months for me, but luckily with monotony comes time seeming like it's going by fast. And you know what? I don't hate it. For the time being. I just hate being in this university.
4.17.24I've been doing better now. Typing this while I'm riding coach on Amtrak.
I mentioned college a lot in these blog posts but I notice I don't seem to talk too much about my studies. I tend to keep quiet about my academic stuff because It tends to tire me and I don't want to feel self-centered when I feel like people struggle more than me.
I'm a geography major, studying what the hell maps do and what to put on maps. It's a fun commitment, especially after bouncing between 3 different majors feeling a sense of hopelessness after computer science didn't pan out what I wanted it to be. Geography is a major I didn't realize I could take, as I've been heavily interested in maps since I was a kid. Hell, I used to be able to recite all the 50 states and where they were and go on Google Earth when I was bored. After completely not giving a shit for my first half in college, I'm now picking up the pace with GIS stuff since it's the big moneymaker. LOL. Freshman, please figure out your majors ASAP and don't be like me at this point.
And yes, I'm still doing the college-radio-thing. I'm doing fairly okay, it's just a big social thing that I need to show face in. I like it, and I of course like meeting new like-minded people, but it's certainly exhausting, so breaks are much needed.
My outlook on college as it stands right now is just trying to be content, but not cynical.
4.12.24Removed.
3.26.24Updates:
Today is my birthday! I've finally reached the age of 20. Not 21 yet, but I guess it's nice to now be in my 20s.
1.24.24Woah. What up. It's the new year, which means some new fun updates:
One thing I noticed about the start of this year, 2024. I swear, I feel like this is going to be a different year than the early 2020s. I mean, we're out of the early 2020s, and approaching the mid 2020s, so it's a given, but it just feels a little different. Not necessarily a bad or a good thing, just an observation.
1.5.24