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'24

Ideas and stories

For the Spring semester next year, I will finally get an opportunity again to return to the darkroom. It's been... 4 years since then? Sheesh. I feel like I forgot so much about everything in there. That being said, a lot of my old ideas will finally come to fruition, ones that I dearly wanted to do ever since high school. The only downside is the fact that I will pretty much only have access to the darkroom for 4 months, so I better make the time count.

I actually tried to scower the internet for local membership-based darkroom which anyone can use. I found this place at an adjacent city 30 minutes north, and they had a pretty good annual membership. I decided to visit them on their opening hours, and upon stepping in I was greeted with a cavalcade of various cameras all over this giant room. I forgot to mention-- they also resell and refurbish cameras. I sheepishly asked the unenthusiastic elderly man running the operation if the annual membership was still in effect. He told me "No, and we haven't since COVID. we no longer have the resources to do so and our room is filled with boxes of cameras." The elderly woman co-running the operation told me that the website hadn't been updated since 2018 and that he didn't know how to log in and change it back...

At that point, I was a bit bummed, but understanding. COVID hadn't been nice to small businesses. I did, however, ended up talking to the elderly woman about photography gear, techniques, and even showed off photos. She gave some very valid criticism. I enjoyed my time there, and decided to not be a freeloader and purchase a camera from them. Left with an untested Canon Powershot S50. Bought a battery and it works flawlessly. Very well-made and usable, even for 2003. A nice little usable point-and-shoot to add to the collection, and I've been bringing it around with me to places to capture some interesting photos. I'll upload them here when I get the time.

Getting back on track... now with a darkroom locked in, I've been sketching up ideas for photo assignments to give myself.

One of my main ideas is called "Hall Monitor"-- a photo series where I go to dimly-lit hallways, office, and library rooms (particularly in my university) at very late hours and capture the desolate and quiet nature. There's something about walking around your university after dark... It's a cozy yet unnerving silence and desolate-ness that's very hard to replicate. I think the feeling is amplified in the Winter. It's worth noting that the photos shown on some of the main pages of this site are from the last self photo assignment I gave myself. I am hoping to do a thing where I change those photos every year.

There's also some things that do bug me about the photos shown on the main pages of my site... mainly compositional and exposure related issues that I didn't catch or hadn't prepared for. I think they're attractive photos, just some stuff that bug me. Also, they're from dusty flatbed scans, and I would rather scan high quality enlargement prints. I actually just bought myself a flatbed scanner for my desk, so maybe some fun scanning will take place for the site in the near future

Speaking of scanning, I added a new page to the website-- it's nothing much, but I thought I would share some cool stuff I sound interesting. No copyright infrigement intended... and I intend on making the descriptions more descriptive. It was also my first go at using MS Front Page to generate a gallery, so I think it looks fun.

Anyhow, that's that.

11.20.24

I kinda miss how I can make long blog entries on my old website.

I'd like to bring that back... With the power of pop-ups!

Finally... My thoughts aren't restricted to my little text box on the blog page.

So.... I feel like I talk about photography a bit too much. Want to divert from that for this update.

First off, academics. Shits been rough as all hell. This has definitely been one of my tough semesters. I've got so many missed assignments and it's really ticking me off. This is also the first semester I work alongside my internship, so imagine all the stuff I got to juggle (+ the radio station). I suppose I'm handling it better, but I'm gonna hit a burn out in December at this rate. Bleh.

I at least like what I've been doing to vibracobra.net so far. I'm trying to keep the updates constantly chugging along to better refine it... and it's really paying off. I just hit 200k hits and gained 13 followers within the past 2 weeks! Kinda crazy how fast it's been gaining. My guestbook is finally active again too, and to hear people inspired by my website means a ton for me. Thank you all!

A little negative a little positive... Let's get back to negative. :<

I'm not one to address politics on my website but I feel like I need to talk about what's going on my fantastic home country called the U S of A.

I'll be honest... I was blindsided by faith from the Harris campaign and happily put my vote for Harris and Walz. The hope was ripe and everyone was telling me "a Trump presidency couldn't happen again. That's just impossible." Yet here we are... 7 days after the winning of the electoral college was announced.

When I look back at the campaign though, I felt like I really disregarded key talking points that Harris should've used to win over the greater party. She tried to appeal to center and neoliberals too hard and forgot that most of the democratic party isn't like that. Neoliberals love to disregard and ignore the working class when they campaign, as well as take right-leaning approaches to immigration (Biden keeping Trump era legislation on immigration at the border) and foreign affairs (Harris's pro-Israel stance on the Palestinean genocide). I was told to "ignore those stances for the greater-good and to not let Trump back into office", but clearly many voters care about those factors. Working class Americans see Trump solely as the "economy man" so they'll just blindly assume that he's gonna make shit good. It's unfortunate the level ignorance in this country has reached to this level. In the words of the late George Carlin:

Everybody complains about politicians. Everybody says they suck. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? They don't fall out of the sky. They don't pass through a membrane from another reality. They come from American parents and American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses and American universities, and they are elected by American citizens. This is the best we can do folks. This is what we have to offer. It's what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you're going to get selfish, ignorant leaders.

In at least SOME good news... I got the opportunity to vote yes on New York's Proposition 1, which goes as follows:

No person shall be denied the equal protection of the laws of this state or any subdivision thereof. No person shall, because of race, color, ethnicity, national origin, age, disability, creed [or], religion, or sex, including sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, pregnancy, pregnancy outcomes, and reproductive healthcare and autonomy, be subjected to any discrimination in [his or her] their civil rights by any other person or by any firm, corporation, or institution, or by the state or any agency or subdivision of the state, pursuant to law.

This is good news for marginalized folk here in New York State, which hopefully will not be federally overturned by the MAGA administration...

Speaking of which, to all my queer friends: PLEASE stay safe out there. Learn self defense, stock up on HRT meds, anything, because I'm afraid it'll get rough. I am also going to leave this link here

Anyways, that's all I'm gonna say about politics and the current state of the USA. Very tiring. I've also run out stuff to say.

11.14.24

I'm now a part of the Canon 5D Mk I club. Got it from KEH because I wanted something serviced and warrantied. I just began selling some of my longtime little digicams from my collection... Currently in the process of selling my Olympus E-10, however I'm happy to see that go. I have already gotten rid of several Olympus cameras from my collection. Sorry to any Olympus diehards... but they CANNOT make good cameras. Our family had am E-M10 Mk II, and it was very finnicky. The micro 4/3s sensor did not produce great images, and yet somehow, the RAWs looked better. I have an OM-1 SLR and it's the least ergonomic thing I've ever used. The film advance lever gives you blisters!

10.25.24

I went to a cool local festival called Bee Side last weekend... And yes, I've already got the photos uploaded. You can find them here! Lots of bands that I took photos of... This time with my new photography setup. Canon EOS D60, Tokina 17mm, 420EX Speedlite. Fun stuff. I'm also soon going to be getting a 5D Mk I... Which means I really need to liquidate my camera collection.

10.21.24

I got a typewriter.

10.15.24

So apparently IA got hacked...?

That's fucked. And on top of that, they were attacked for the wrong reason. Seems like that Hacktivist group thought they were doing something righteous, but doesn't attacking the IA harm anti-censorship and hides information about tyrannical governments? I digress.

With the Wayback Machine down by extension, that means a lot of information and history is temporarily lost. Please... back up your websites! If it can happen to IA, it can happen here.

10.10.24

Ugh. October.

This may seem like a controversial take, but... I am not a huge fan of Fall and Halloween is my least favorite holiday (right next to Easter).

I love Spring and Summer just due to the fact that it's constantly warm and sunny and I don't have too much responsibilities to juggle. Life becomes quiet again. Fall is just a stark reminder of how the next 6 months are going to be colder, dull, and shut-in. My classes will get harder and harder. At least I get to dress the way I want, but that isn't a good compromise.

10.4.24

I don't like being overwhelmed with work. I'm juggling too many responsibilities. One day I'm focusing on academics, another day it's my internship, and the day after that it's my club... at the end of the day, I don't have time to do homework, and I end missing quizzes and homework assignments. I should've enrolled into less taxing classes, but my major tells me to. Does anyone with GIS and R experience want to do my assignments? (joking)

9.30.24

I am now onto my 3rd year of university, now halfway through. Life will get a bit busy again...

At least I have a decent job. I just bought a Canon Speedlite 420EX and a Tokina AT-X 17mm f3.5. If you saw the recent-er show I went to (still have to write-up the one I went to on 9/15), some of my photos are a bit bad looking (in my opinion). I was actually just using a 0.43x fisheye adapter for a Canon Ultrasonic lens I was mainly using. Also, the flash unit I was using (Sunpak 144D Thyristor from probably the early 90s) was far too overpowered. Even with a square of 0.6 ND gel in front of the bulb, it still terribly blinded me (yes, I shot it in front of my eyes...).

Anyways, that's my photography rant.

9.23.24

One month later and I'm still purchasing little treats for myself...

Had some extra funny money from my paycheck so I bought a MINT CONDITION Sony DSR-PDX10! I can replace my old reliable DVX100. Next camcorder I am aiming to get is an HVR-Z1 to get some sick 1080i footage. Yes, I am very good at budgeting. Cameras come before wellbeing!

This website's 6 year anniversary is coming up soon. Cool! The fast passage of time as I get older is quite terrifying.

8.22.24

Believe me... Next show I go to, I promise the photos I get back from it will look 10x better with my new camera. Promise!!!

Also, trying out new format for show writeups. More of an article type-of format.

7.28.24

Been a while.

I've been doing really well tackling my anxiety, the right medication does help. Celexa has been fantastic. At first it hit me a bit (I was ironically anxious about the side effects despite not having any. I was only easily fatigued) but as I've been taking it I've been able to live again!

Aside from that, I went to a show July 3rd and I'll be adding my photos and write-up of it soon.

I also got a camera, Canon EOS D60. Moving away from my older cameras in favor of a nice (but old) digital SLR.

7.22.24

So I've started a new job that's been fantastic. The only downside is that as soon as I started working for it, I've been having a whole bunch of doctor's appts that have been racking my brain and I'm now on two new meds (one being a famous anti-depressant/anti-anxiety) and ironically it's making me feel slightly more anxious.

I should probably write about my experiences with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (and more-so OCD) over the past two years.

6.17.24

I've been kinda been thinking a lot of how the machines inside my car work.

I didn't read a book about them yet, but rest assured I will read a book about them soon.

6.11.24

It's been about 5 days since the rework/update, and so far it's shaping up really nicely. I'm liking the new look very much.

I just reworked the film photo gallery to align more with the new style, along with some new photos I took. The digital gallery will follow soon after... it'll look the exact same.

5.29.24

Website version 5.0 is now up.

I was bored tonight... So I thought, "let's randomly rework the website!"

Some of the extra pages still need to be worked on (namely the photo gallery), so it's not entirely done yet.

Oh, and, before you scream that it looks absolutely broken... clear your browser cache, or view it in a private tab.

5.24.24

So... Before I started this website, I used to be a very active Team Fortress 2 player. I predominantly played between February 2017 to May of 2021. I accrued 1,400 hours in the game in that short of a timeframe.

Back on May 9th, I had just finished up my last final exam and I was feeling bored. TF2 came up in my head out of nowhere, and I felt a weird inclination to return to the game. It's only been 2 weeks so far... I've already put in 46 hours in. Help me.

5.22.24

Tying up loose ends in my life before the Summer starts, and today's the last day of finals. I'm actually feeling hopeful in my life.

I'm likely to be leaving my IT/audio-visual job very soon, I finally got an internship. The work environment is very lenient and the benefits seem really great. It's pretty exciting to finally enter the workforce that involves my major.

I'm still at the college radio station, still doing audio engineering work. Kinda sucks a little bit.

That's life right now. It's 70% good now, not quite 100%.

So I heard that 123guestbook is closing? I didn't like it too much. For some reason, I got much less visitors and comments using it. I guess I liked the custom URLs they would allow to use, and the fact that it was HTTPS. I've been a predominant user of smartGB and I've been very happy with how it's ran, I actually people should go on to use it. I dunno. Just an opinion.

REST IN PEACE STEVE ALBINI!

 5.8.24

I feel like updating this more. It's the end of the semester but I have some work to do. Am bored.

I did my final photography assignment for a class and shot with my Canon EOS ElanIIe with some borrowed Ultrasonic lenses with 400 speed color film. I love the fact that I own this camera, but I don't love not owning the lenses I'm borrowing. This 28-135mm that I have the pleasure of using is fucking MARVELOUS! Canon just knows how to make lenses that feel great.

I also had another camera on hand with me, a Nikon F3 loaded with Ultramax with a 24mm lens on it. I think I'm enlightened. The F3 is so nice, I'm thinking of buying one for myself. It's a shame that I'm borrowing it. It's pretty much a perfectly made SLR that's not a pain in the fucking ass like most Olympuses and Minoltas are. I've had the unfortunate displeasure of using an OM-1 to shoot a roll about 4 years ago. The camera is a frustrating un-ergonomic piece of shit that has a film advance so sharp it was giving me blisters and loading the film was also terribly frustrating. Even a Canon AE-1 from this era would be marginally better than using this! I can't imagine why anyone would want to use an SLR pre-1980.

That was fun enough to distract me from everything else going on. I'm just terribly busy with everything right now. Two weekends in a row of traveling to see friends and I haven't really had a day to myself. I'm typing this right now on shift at work, and then when work ends I have to go straight to classes for 6 hours straight. This has been the last 4 months for me, but luckily with monotony comes time seeming like it's going by fast. And you know what? I don't hate it. For the time being. I just hate being in this university.

4.17.24

I've been doing better now. Typing this while I'm riding coach on Amtrak.

I mentioned college a lot in these blog posts but I notice I don't seem to talk too much about my studies. I tend to keep quiet about my academic stuff because It tends to tire me and I don't want to feel self-centered when I feel like people struggle more than me.

I'm a geography major, studying what the hell maps do and what to put on maps. It's a fun commitment, especially after bouncing between 3 different majors feeling a sense of hopelessness after computer science didn't pan out what I wanted it to be. Geography is a major I didn't realize I could take, as I've been heavily interested in maps since I was a kid. Hell, I used to be able to recite all the 50 states and where they were and go on Google Earth when I was bored. After completely not giving a shit for my first half in college, I'm now picking up the pace with GIS stuff since it's the big moneymaker. LOL. Freshman, please figure out your majors ASAP and don't be like me at this point.

And yes, I'm still doing the college-radio-thing. I'm doing fairly okay, it's just a big social thing that I need to show face in. I like it, and I of course like meeting new like-minded people, but it's certainly exhausting, so breaks are much needed.

My outlook on college as it stands right now is just trying to be content, but not cynical.

4.12.24

Removed.

3.26.24

Updates:

2.19.24

Today is my birthday! I've finally reached the age of 20. Not 21 yet, but I guess it's nice to now be in my 20s.

1.24.24

Woah. What up. It's the new year, which means some new fun updates:

One thing I noticed about the start of this year, 2024. I swear, I feel like this is going to be a different year than the early 2020s. I mean, we're out of the early 2020s, and approaching the mid 2020s, so it's a given, but it just feels a little different. Not necessarily a bad or a good thing, just an observation.

1.5.24